Tuesday, December 25th, 2012

Ratatat – Loud Pipes


Saturday, November 10th, 2012

Wanderhouse – Lights (Ellie Goulding Cover)


Wednesday, October 31st, 2012

Emiliana Torrini – Gun


Tuesday, September 11th, 2012

Aloe Blacc – I need a dollar


Favorite Things: Kitchen Edition

source: yellowcake and alliance

Oprah did it. So did Martha. And now I’m jumping on the bandwagon.

  1. Bormioli Rocco Frigoverre Jug with Hermetic Lid
    This thing is amazing. Its compact shape is perfect for the fridge. The hermetic lid makes it possible to mix everything with a good shake or two. It’s made of solid, heavy-duty glass that’s able withstand being banged into the fridge rack without shattering and ruining my day. Love it!
  2. Epicurean 2-Piece Prep Series Set
    Made out of recycled materials, these cutting boards are heavy duty while being slim and easy to fit into a drawer or cabinet. They’re also perfectly content in the dishwasher. I’ll never have to deal with splitting, oiling or warping ever again.
  3. Danica Studio Tango Apron, Shelter
    I won’t lie to you, I love everything that Danica Studio makes. In fact, I found their trade catalogue and fantasized about opening a boutique just to sell all their products and get first dibs on everything that came in. Danica Studio is a design house that chiefly makes beautiful patterns and prints. This particular pattern is called Shelter, and it’s a bunch of little bird houses, which I found just absolutely adorable, but not too intense like some of their other patterns can be when applied to an apron. Anyway, the apron itself is cut nicely so that it fits well and covers everything that could be splashed. It’s made of thicker material to help shield clothes, and is easy to take on and off. Plus, it makes my kitchen look cuter.
  4. CIA Masters Collection Measuring Spoon Set
    After years of hard labor, my old plastic measuring spoons finally had enough, and it was time to man up and buy some quality ones. I searched high and low for reasonably priced measuring spoons that included eighth and quarter sizes. These spoons are awesome. They’ve got a good weight to them and class up the kitchen.
  5. RSVP International 7-pc. Endurance Measuring Cups
    Same sad story – old plastic measuring cups just didn’t cut it anymore. These cups are solid; they stand on their own (bonus), and have nice long handles that are perfect for dipping into bags, boxes and jars of dry goods.

 

Don’t get too excited, dear reader. Unlike Oprah, I’m not giving away any of this stuff. Likewise, I haven’t been compensated in any way for this post, or its glowing review of these fancy products.


Whatever, Martha

I’ve recently been perusing the Martha Stewart site for recipes and tips. Why? I don’t know. I’m probably the last person anyone would ever look at and say, “Now there’s a homemaker!” If anything, I probably subscribe to the Roseanne style of housewifery. Still, Martha has some clever ideas that come in handy now that we’ve cleaned our kitchen and defrosted our freezer. It’s now possible to actually, you know, cook stuff. And freeze things.

Anyway, one thing led to another, and I discovered that Martha’s daughter Alexis had a TV show called Whatever, Martha. Here’s a clip where they make fun of Martha making s’mores. Enjoy!


Sunday, August 19th, 2012

Florence + the Machine – No Light No Light


Monday, August 13th, 2012

Nick Waterhouse – Say I wanna Know


Ziggy Stardust

Zignatius Purr
Epitomizing everything that is a Ragdoll, Ziggy is the greatest little cat we’ve ever met, and we’ve met some pretty great cats in our time. What makes him so great, you ask?

  • He waits by the door until we return
  • Occasionally, he howls
  • He chases his tail
  • He’s learned how to sit and is working on stay
  • He follows us around the house
  • If we’re going too fast, he chases us and hugs our legs
  • He has the goofiest galloping run I’ve ever seen on a cat – nothing graceful about it, just pure hilarity
  • He’s full of purrs and loves to be picked up, carried, petted and hugged
  • If he believes he has not been picked up, carried, petted or hugged sufficiently, he will sit in front of you and lean until he falls on you and you’re forced to hug him

Hardly an exhaustive list, but that’s for starters.


Writing a book makes you a horrible blogger

Which isn’t to say that I was that great of a blogger to begin with, but I am objectively much worse as a result of focusing all my typing energy on book stuff.

 

In other news, book things are happening. And they are very, very cool.


Friday, June 15th, 2012

Fever Ray – Keep the Streets Empty for Me


Ravaged by a Shark

Quick: how would a herd of animals consisting of a bison, a crocodile and a shark effectively attack someone? This was the subject of conversation that resulted in this priceless quote:

“Well, the bison could knock you back towards the river, where the crocodile would shimmy up to you and drag you into the water. There, the shark would ravage you.”

Which subsequently resulted in this image:


Ostriches


I sent a picture of some ostriches (don’t ask why) to one of my coworkers, who for the sake of this post, we’ll call CheeseBalls. CheeseBalls’ reaction to the image was violent and immediate. He shouted and recoiled in horror.

“What the fuck, dude?” I asked, incredulous.

“YOU KNOW I HATE OSTRICHES!” CheeseBalls shouted, accusatorially across the desks.

“I did not know that, actually.”

“THEY ARE MY GREATEST FEAR.”

“What the fuck. Seriously?”

“YES! THEY’RE HORRIBLE.”

At this point, the entire office is paying attention and laughing.

“That doesn’t even make any sense,” I protested. “I mean, how often do you encounter an ostrich? It’s not like we live in Australia.”

“There are ostriches in Australia!?”

“What, did I ruin that for you, too?”


Friday, January 20th, 2012

Clare Maguire – Ain’t Nobody (Breakage Remix)


Spam makes me laugh.

So, I got the following in my email today:

The subject is really what cracks me up, because in reading it, I pronounce it, and invariably, it sounds like this.

Also, I like how you can buy online ear infections. Didn’t know that was a thing.


Parenting, part III: Encouragement and Enthusiasm

Manfriend is loud. As a person, he has a loud voice that permeates even the quietest recesses of our home. I will occasionally have to tell him to use his fucking indoor voice because he is not seven, he is a man, and his outdoor voice is loud and inescapable.

When and if we have a child, we will need to acclimate our child to Manfriend’s bouts of loudness. Likewise, I am belligerent. The combination of these two traits means we will need to show our child that loud and belligerent behavior is not inherently negative or scary. It can be exciting!

To do this, I think we will need to become the super enthusiastic parents. Pretend our child is an athlete. Respond accordingly. For instance:

“Are you a baby? You’re a fucking baby! YEAH! Is that a kitty? That’s AN ADORABLE KITTY CAT! SAY KITTY CAT! SAY IT AGAIN! SAY KITTY CAT ONE MORE FUCKING TIME, MOTHERFUCKER! HA HAHAHAHAHA MURDER!”

“How old are you? SHOW ME HOW FUCKING OLD YOU ARE! HOW MANY FINGERS IS THAT? TWO? TWO IS THE BEST AGE OF ALL TIME!”

I anticipate Manfriend will punctuate these declarations of support and love with shouts, leaping up from his seat and screaming, “YEAH!” at the top of his fucking lungs.


Parenting, Part II: The Notebook

When/if we have kids, I will keep a small notebook on me at all times. Whenever our child complains that something is unfair, or that they are displeased with how a situation has progressed, I will pull out the notebook and write it down. I imagine something like this will unfold:

At two years:

“No no no no no!”
“[Baby awesome*] does not want to put on pants. Noted.” And I will proceed to write something in the notebook.

 

At three years:

“I don’t want carrots!”
“[Baby awesome] does not want carrots. Noted.”
“What are you doing?”
“Making a note of your complaint.”
“Oh.” I assume this will baffle our child all of once. 

At some point, the notebook will cease to confound them. Instead, they will either ignore it, or insist on seeing it. At this point, [baby awesome] will still not be able to read. I will happily show them the notebook. They may attempt to write in it themselves, or destroy it. I will allow them to do neither.

I will let this progress for as long as it is amusing and as long as the kid puts up with it. Eventually, the kid will get old enough to sense taunting, at which point the notebook will be put away for a few years.

Eventually, the kid will find it and read it. And they will realize… they have been trolled so hard.

*placeholder name